Unorthodox Words Sneak Peek Pt. 3
BEING BITTER AIN’T CUTE.
Confession time: I use to hold grudges and would turn so cold-hearted so quick. My biggest weakness is disconnecting from people that I truly care about, thinking that I am protecting me in the long run. Not true. It does not keep me protected, and definitely does not protect them. That disconnection just stemmed from my willingness to hold on to resentment and bitterness. The people that read this blog that actually personally know me, know that I am a VERY caring person. Well, that caring person definitely gets thrown off the cliff once I feel betrayed, hurt, dismissed, or any other negative feeling that triggers me. I wrote this poem to myself because I had to finally grow up. I had to realize I can never become the person I truly desire to be if I hold onto all this pain that other people caused me. Now it is just pain I am causing myself.
NEWSFLASHHHH…
Holding a grudge is just pride.
That sentence was hard for me to type. Not even gonna lie to you.
But it is true. Feeling entitled caused me to feel like I deserved to keep bad blood between me and somebody else. And entitlement is pride on steroids. Disconnecting from people made me feel in control. Something I felt so out of my whole life. Then I realized….entitlement gets me NOWHERE. I am not saying don’t disconnect from situations that are unhealthy for you. But allow yourself to work through the discomfort. Once you let the bitterness melt away, you might see that the situation is salvageable. Sometimes all you need to do is communicate your feelings and be transparent as hell. That transparency then will allow the other person to see you as purely human, instead of a cold-hearted human. Sometimes feeling in control feels better at the moment, but I truly believe that surrendering takes more strength. And I will be proud of that over entitlement any day. But I am a work in progress as all of you are. BUT WE GOT THIS!
This is why I write, this is why I blog, this is why I podcast. I am showing the world that I am human with so many flaws and so much to work on, but I am still beautiful and powerful despite all of that. We all are. It will forever be my mission to use my vulnerable moments to help someone else be great and shine brighter than I ever did.
My motivation to you today is melt away any frozen parts of you. Show someone you truly love the green that wants to break through so bad.
Or better yet, show yourself.